Grandma is FREE

My grandma finally got released from the nursing home and is in her new apartment. We were so relieved to have her out of the nursing home on Monday night. Mom was wanting to bring her home with her for a couple of days to make sure she was ok on her feet before bringing her back to the apartment, the place where she fell and broke her hip, but Grandma insisted she'd rather go straight to her own place. Now she's been so overwhelmed with all the changes that she's been crying and fighting with my mom, scared to go to sleep at night and calling me each morning to say "what do I do now?". I spent the last two days with her to relieve my poor mother of all the stress she's been under since January - having her live with her, selling her house (Grandma's), finding her an assisted living apartment, then having her fall and break her hip, go through hip surgery and living in a nursing home for a month without being able to walk, and now finally getting back into the apartment and she cries. My sister and I went yesterday with our three kids and had to leave her in the dining room with all the other old people and she almost started to cry. That's when my sister said it's like the first day of kindergarten. She was right. Then I came back at dinnertime and my grandma did cry, at the table. I had to put a stop to that so she wouldn't embarrass herself and no one would want to talk to her. I told her she was fine, just like my sister tells her 4 year old son. "We're at the restaurant Grandma (really it was the dining room to her place - that looks just like a Hiatt Hotel - but she thinks it's a restaurant). You do not cry here. We will talk when we get back to your room." So she stopped and I had to leave her alone to go get something and see if someone would sit by her and be her friend. Very much like dropping off your kid at kindergarten or preschool. Someone did come sit with her, her old friend from 15 years ago who my mom originally went to visit and later talked Grandma into living there. Her name is Rose and she's wonderful. She gave Grandma a pep talk and cheered her up. She told her to make new friends and stop relying on her family. Matty and I went back and ate with them and Grandma was doing a lot better. Later, Chris took Matthew, who had been the star of the whole place, running up to people at their tables to wave and try to beg for more ice cream, and I brought Grandma back to her place and set her up with some beautiful white board creations - so she had her schedule and notes to remind her of things attached to her fridge. And we had a little talk. I told her how much she encouraged me in college when I was lonely or wanted to quit. She always told me how strong she was to be a widow for so long (as long as I've been alive) and that I had to be like her. So the tables have turned and I gave her the same speech, saying she had to be more like herself too. And that this too will pass. She is much like a child now, and has to re-learn a lot of things, but at least she doesn't have to re-learn how to pray. She said she was scared at night and couldn't sleep, but then she prayed to God and felt better and went to sleep. I told her that's exactly what she told me to do when I was alone and scared in my house in college (when roommates would come home at all hours and I heard strange sounds) and it worked! She has always told me that when you pray to God, there He is, everytime! He gives you comfort and company and love, all the time. She has no doubt about that to this day, just needs to be reminded from time to time. Especially now. She is getting through yet another trial in her life and when she gets to the end of it, we will have to remind her to look back at where she's been, because she won't remember. But we remember for her. Then I have to remind my mom that Grandma has dimensia and that's why she doesn't have the correct sense of reality. (I'm wondering now if dimensia might be contageous.) My mom has been so incredible with all of this. I'm entirely proud of her and hope to be as together and selfless as she has been with my own parents and kids when/if they really need me.