Magvou's Pages

update on my dad

2006-10-23T05:51:00.000-07:00

Someone remind me to update you on my dad. I gotta go to sleep now. You'll see why when you read the blog entry below.

My pile of laundry of a life

2006-10-23T05:41:00.000-07:00

I just thought of my friend from Romania a second ago, because I have a HUGE pile of laundry and at the bottom I found some shirts and pants that should not have been at the bottom of the pile because now they need some major ironing. That's when I said "I wish Iuliana was here. She would LOVE to do this ironing" That is actually a really good metephor. The PILE of laundry represents my life right now. It is overwhelming, overpiled with too much to do and worry about and be in charge of. So much that I haven't been able to sleep. I am up now at 4:51am, because tossing and turning usually ends up in less rest than if I just get up. It gets my muscles all in a twitch because I stress out that I'm not sleeping and then I start wondering why, and then all the stress of life comes to mind and I get up and start typing. I'm trying to pray through it, instead of type through it, but I think it is too much to piece together to even be able to pray about. That's where you come in. Sometimes you just need someone else to pray and to sort out the situtation with God for you. Since I know so many prayer people, I thought I'd bring this current mess in my life to your attentions. Please pray for me that I "iron" out the things in my life that need ironing and then that I "clean out my closet" and find a way to put the thoughts in my mind away in the right places and get the "pile of clothes folded" so I can relax and do more important things, like play with my son and teach him new songs. The ironing out, is the processing through all of the things I'm committing to and finding a way to fit them into my life, the cleaning out the closet is trying to figure out what to eliminate from my life, and folding the clothes is getting my life back in order so I can sleep again and work and live without stress and a constant feeling that there's something I should be doing.

You're probably wondering what in the world is causing me all this stress and piles of laundry, right? I'll list it off systematically and maybe that will help me confirm what to cut.

It probably strated with the baby girl that I watch needing to come to my house 3 times a week instead of 2. That only lasted a couple of weeks, and then my business (tutoring and hiring others out to tutor) started a big BOOM, so I had to get someone else to replace me to watch her for one of the three days. That gave me more space to work on my business and spend more time with Matthew and my grandmother on that day. That time with Matthew and Grandma didn't last long though, because I realized I needed to take an online teaching class to keep my credential current, so I signed up for that and added a book to read to my life and the impending class to the load of stress. If that wasn't enough, before the book even arrived, a former student's mom called to see if I could find teachers for her daughter to be schooled at home for 16 hours a week. I found two for her and it was working out, but only for 2 weeks, before the second of the two teachers suddenly quit and I am now forced to go through the interview and screening process to find another teacher for this girl. I also had a number of other students looking for teachers. With the pile of resumes I had to go through for the first girl, I ended up hiring someone for another former student who had been looking to come back but needed a teacher and one other from my church who is teaching math with me. That means in the month of Oct, I added 4 new staff members to the three I already had. WOW. No wonder I'm stressed. But that's not all. The very last thing that I've undertaken has me thrown for a loop, but I really believe there is no one else for the job and at least I have help. My good friend, and mother of the baby I watch has agreed to join me in leading the baby and toddler ministry at our church. It is a group of 13-17 kids who desperately needed the dedication and organization and leadership to have a much better time in the room they stay in while their parents are at church. So while I've been looking for a teacher to replace the one who quit on me, I took it upon myself this weekend to organize the toys, arts and crafts, scheduling of team members, and many other duties for the little ones at our church. To top it all off, my son was sick and my husband was out of town for 4 days. It is now Monday morning, 5:15am. Both baby and husband are asleep and I am without sleep, trying to deal with the pile of laundry that is my life's stresses piled on top of each other.

So what in the world can I cut? I am trying to work that out. I have a couple of ideas and am going to try them out in my mind before attempting to pull them out from under the pile of clothes, in fear that the whole pile will tumble down and create a bigger mess all over the floor. The guest bed is calling to me though because I have an out of the country guest coming and I have no choice but to remove those literal clothes from the bed and then the "clothes" from my life so that I can welcome him properly and spend time with him shopping and catching up on his life. Yes. My former supervisor from Ukraine is coming for 3 days and I'm so excited to have a chance to DROP all of the balls I have in the air and just cater to him. But before I can do that, I need to find places for those balls so they don't just run off and leave me chasing after them in the days after my friend leaves. Well, I don't know where all these metaphors are coming from, but they're helping to keep me in check and realize there are ways to get out of the juggling act and the constant piles of laundry. PRAY and eliminate! And I think I'll go for a walk with Matty and the baby today to sort all this out in my mind. Plus they would love to walk to the park, well, they ride in their double stroller, I walk. As if I have time for that. But I should really make it. It would be good for us. Please pray that I take more walks, get more sleep and unpile the enormous pile of stress I am faced with. Thank you. And find some time to go grocery shopping so we can have some food in the house.

Hope all is well with all of you. Write me back to let me know.

Matty and his buddy Kari

2006-09-25T09:19:00.000-07:00

Matty and his buddy Kari,
originally uploaded by write2france.

Uh Oh, Karina has noticed and started taking Matty's toys. What will he do? He'll have to share!!! Karina is the little girl I watch 3 times a week. She is a year younger than Matty, but a great playmate for him. He will be learning to share before he gets a brother or sister and will be oh so happy about doing so when he or she arrives, whenever that will be. Thanks for breaking him in, Kari (that's what Matty calls her)!

Click on this photo to see it bigger and view more recently taken photos of Matty! (I signed up for flickr.com and it's a cool way that I can finally post pictures to my blog. That other way never worked for me and Mark and Dan never did help after offering. That's ok. I didn't bug them to help either. Too much going on. I like this way better than the piccolo anyway) Gotta go get Matty. Enjoy the pics. France

Life as a mom of a 1 1/2 year old - never turn your back

2006-09-13T06:32:00.000-07:00

I finally have a free minute to write a blog entry. It's been a while and so much has gone on. Matty (who is now 18 months, 21 pounds and 33 inches tall) has been constantly wanting to color, swim, watch a movie and play with pillows on our bed or simply walk around the house trying to find something to climb - all which require immediate supervision. The movie on the bed used to be something I could have him do while I emailed, but this throwing of pillows and jumping up and down has caused me to have to be in there. So now I'm up early so I could get a shower in. That has been eliminated from his awake time unless Daddy is home because he had been happy playing in the pack n' play watching a movie until I found him climbed up to the corner about to jump out after a shower last week. Needless to say, I've been a little smelly lately.

I also increased the amount of time I have in home day care with my best friend's daughter (now 6 months and crawling and pulling herself to standing like crazy) from 2 to 3 days a week. I figure they're only this little once, so enjoy the chaos now and do things like shower and write on the computer when they start school :) I used to get computer time in when Matty went to sleep at night, but now I'm so exhausted from the day, my bed time has been about a half hour after his.

I should mention that Matty is not an out of control or dare devil child. He is just exploring and finding ways to get higher. He's pretty cautious as compared to some stories I've heard about more reckless, accident-prone children. He is learning to get down stairs and he always holds on the rail or holds his had up to Mom or Dad to take it. And I'm so excited about the language he's developing. He's in that "copying stage" where he'll attempt anything we ask him to say. My favorite is, of course, "I love you Mommy", which comes out a little muffled, but I know he means it as he repeats it over and over while saying goodnight. He had a couple of weeks where he protested going in his crib, but thankful that is over while he's going for the "say night night to red bear and doggy and lamb (stuffed animal pals)" and then we put him in the crib with them and stay to rub his tummy and say prayers and night nights and I love yous until he calms down to the point of letting us leave the room so he can curl his hair and listen to his music till he's asleep. What a procedure. This replaced reading books and rocking in the chair which he figured out to be his nighttime routine a couple of weeks ago and completely refused to pick up a book anytime after 8pm. I am glad we get reading books in more during the day now, so it's not associated with sleep. We'll have to see how long this saying goodnight to the animals game is going to last though. He's on to our antics :)

Hope all is well with everyone out there on my blog list. Drop me a line and let me know what's going on with you. Blessings. Francine

answered prayer

2006-06-28T05:54:00.000-07:00

Thank you for all your prayers. My dad came out of the surgery well. He was also progressing well afterwards, even though he was still sedated. The nurses told him after he woke up the next day (he was out for about 24 hrs), that he was their star pupil that day because he came around so fast with his vitals, etc. I'm so releived and praying for his moods and mom's ability to remain sane during his recovery.

God is faithful and looking after us. I believe He is definitely getting my family's attention. I coudn't believe this was actually happening, until Mon morning when I woke up at 2:30am and realized, "they're cutting my father's chest open today - I have to go see him". I prayed and prayed that he would be ok and that he would have a change of heart spiritually after such a scare. Yesterday when I got to talk to him after the surgery, the prayer started to be answered. He said he knew that God saved him and that was because of my prayers and that He didn't call his number yet because he was supposed to be around longer to be with his grandchildren. WOW. An almost verbatim answer to the prayer I wrote out that morning for him. I didn't think it would come so soon. I continue to pray that he will be a changed man. The man who told me in high school he didn't have time to read the Bible, he had to work. Now he is talking about retiring and isn't even concerned about golfing in 2-3 months. He actually said "I have all the time in the world to golf. I'll golf with Ted (who is in heaven) when I get there. I just have to get better. When something like this happens, you really think about what matters." I should have had a tape recorder for this. My mom and I will have to attest that he said that when it is time for him to really complain that he can't golf yet. I have never heard him talk like this in my life. Praise GOD!

PRAYER FOR DAD

2006-06-25T22:21:00.000-07:00

I know the Lord is watching over him, but I thought
I'd get all the prayer we can get tonight and tomorrow
morning. My father was rushed to the ER Sat night
because of chest pains which turned out to be a heart
attack. He is scheduled for early morning
double-quadruple bypass surgery in the morning -
whichever is needed when they get in there. Please
pray for his protection and survival through the
surgery and for my family as we go through this with
him. He will have a rough time recovering and resting,
as he always does after surgeries. This is a BIG one
though, so we'll all have to be on him for rest and
diet regulations.

I think God is definitely giving him a chance here to choose to
get to know Him better and spend quality time with his
Maker. He has already beentalking about early
retirement and taking it "easy".

Thank you in advance for your prayers. For my MOM TOO>
She's been through quite a lot lately with taking care
of her mom, now she'll be taking care of her husband
and quite disappointed they didn't get to take their
Vegas trip they were planning to leave for this TUES
and the heart attack just happened to fall on her
birthday. We went out for a big dinner with the whole
family last night and then it happened after she'd
already gone to bed. Thank GOD the pain woke my dad up
in his chair and he was able to get to the hospital to
"get fixed up", as he puts it. Please pray for my
mom's patience, strength and comfort in the LORD to
continue. Thanks so much. Francine

Grandma is FREE

2006-06-15T05:19:00.000-07:00

My grandma finally got released from the nursing home and is in her new apartment. We were so relieved to have her out of the nursing home on Monday night. Mom was wanting to bring her home with her for a couple of days to make sure she was ok on her feet before bringing her back to the apartment, the place where she fell and broke her hip, but Grandma insisted she'd rather go straight to her own place. Now she's been so overwhelmed with all the changes that she's been crying and fighting with my mom, scared to go to sleep at night and calling me each morning to say "what do I do now?". I spent the last two days with her to relieve my poor mother of all the stress she's been under since January - having her live with her, selling her house (Grandma's), finding her an assisted living apartment, then having her fall and break her hip, go through hip surgery and living in a nursing home for a month without being able to walk, and now finally getting back into the apartment and she cries. My sister and I went yesterday with our three kids and had to leave her in the dining room with all the other old people and she almost started to cry. That's when my sister said it's like the first day of kindergarten. She was right. Then I came back at dinnertime and my grandma did cry, at the table. I had to put a stop to that so she wouldn't embarrass herself and no one would want to talk to her. I told her she was fine, just like my sister tells her 4 year old son. "We're at the restaurant Grandma (really it was the dining room to her place - that looks just like a Hiatt Hotel - but she thinks it's a restaurant). You do not cry here. We will talk when we get back to your room." So she stopped and I had to leave her alone to go get something and see if someone would sit by her and be her friend. Very much like dropping off your kid at kindergarten or preschool. Someone did come sit with her, her old friend from 15 years ago who my mom originally went to visit and later talked Grandma into living there. Her name is Rose and she's wonderful. She gave Grandma a pep talk and cheered her up. She told her to make new friends and stop relying on her family. Matty and I went back and ate with them and Grandma was doing a lot better. Later, Chris took Matthew, who had been the star of the whole place, running up to people at their tables to wave and try to beg for more ice cream, and I brought Grandma back to her place and set her up with some beautiful white board creations - so she had her schedule and notes to remind her of things attached to her fridge. And we had a little talk. I told her how much she encouraged me in college when I was lonely or wanted to quit. She always told me how strong she was to be a widow for so long (as long as I've been alive) and that I had to be like her. So the tables have turned and I gave her the same speech, saying she had to be more like herself too. And that this too will pass. She is much like a child now, and has to re-learn a lot of things, but at least she doesn't have to re-learn how to pray. She said she was scared at night and couldn't sleep, but then she prayed to God and felt better and went to sleep. I told her that's exactly what she told me to do when I was alone and scared in my house in college (when roommates would come home at all hours and I heard strange sounds) and it worked! She has always told me that when you pray to God, there He is, everytime! He gives you comfort and company and love, all the time. She has no doubt about that to this day, just needs to be reminded from time to time. Especially now. She is getting through yet another trial in her life and when she gets to the end of it, we will have to remind her to look back at where she's been, because she won't remember. But we remember for her. Then I have to remind my mom that Grandma has dimensia and that's why she doesn't have the correct sense of reality. (I'm wondering now if dimensia might be contageous.) My mom has been so incredible with all of this. I'm entirely proud of her and hope to be as together and selfless as she has been with my own parents and kids when/if they really need me.

FINALLY feeling better - and Grandma gets to walk again!

2006-06-05T13:31:00.000-07:00

I don't want to jinx it, but it looks like I'm figuring out what makes me feel better. Vegetarianism is quite the ticket at this point and small frequent meals... I'll see what other tricks my doctor has up his sleeve tomorrow. Grandma gets to put weight on her leg today. She'll be re-learning how to walk for the 4th time in her life. First, as a baby, then after the big accident 33 years ago when my grandfather died and she had been in a full body cast for 3 months, then this Jan when she fell and hurt her back, and now after the hip surgery. She is such an inspiration as she keeps on kicking! Hopefully she'll be able to go back to the assisted living apartment SOON! I'm going to visit her today while one of my staff members watches moody Matty. He wasn't so nice yesterday at our Mom's group family BBQ - he's got at least 3 mollers coming in. And very fond of the word "no" right now. At least I know it goes both ways. I respect when he says no and he does for us :) He was more fun to be around this morning when I had the baby and she slept for 3 hours and Matty and I worked in the garden, organized my make-up, ate lunch and hung around. It was a very quiet morning. Now the baby is playing and rolling - unbelievably quick developer- she rolls both ways at 3 months old - and Matty is sleeping. Better go check and make sure since I hear his music getting louder for some reason. I'll write more after visiting Grandma. Hope she is up and at 'em today!

Leaving "Procedure Land" hopefully never to return for a long while

2006-06-01T17:42:00.000-07:00

As my husband well stated, this month I've had a not-so-fun member pass to "Procedure Land". Today was the last of them, although it was technically June 1, but had been rescheduled from May 30th because my physician had been sick. I am really sick of having to see him. He's a nice guy, but a little too excited about looking at the insides of people's digestive tracts, if you know what I mean. The endoscopy wasn't too bad. If you ever have to choose between the four procedures I've understaken this month - that's actually the last one and the best one. I will spare you the details, just remember to contact me before having to do any of the LOVELY GI series of tests. I have a bunch of tips on how to get through them. So I will talk to my doc on Tues and hopefully have some kind of real answer to the real pain I've been having. In the meantime, bread is apparently a new enemy - it hasn't been my friend. Oh well, never really liked it anyway. I'll just have to stick with my really good friends: artichokes, olives (also matty's favorites, as mentioned below), milk shakes with protein powder, soups (although it is highly not a good idea to mix the vanilla flavored protein powder in with carrot or any other vegetable soup- UGH!), veggie burgers, spinach pasta, greek yogurt (from Trader Joes- it's so good. It tastes like sour cream with a touch of yogurt flavor) and nuts! Well I gotta get back to work. After Marky gets a chance to talk me through how to post pictures I'll wow you with the oh so talented and beautiful Matty and his magic in front of a lense! Stay tuned to see the cutest kid ever!

Just try and make me eat my vegetables

2006-06-01T09:29:00.000-07:00

I tried to post a really funny picture of Matthew here, but it didn't work. So you'll have to imagine getting to see a silly pic of Matty refusing to eat his veggies. He's sort of a picky eater, but knows what he wants. I'll post another picture of him eating an artichoke. He likes those very much. And olives. He'll take a piece of pizza and pick off the olives and pass on the rest. Welll, I better stop talking about food. I can't have any today. Well, at least until after the endoscopy is over. That's at 11:30 today. Anyone reading this can pray for me. Thanks. Hopefully we'll know what's wrong with me soon. Like they haven't seen enough of my body to finally figure it out! Grandma is doing better. She will be able to put weight on her leg again in about a week and might be able to go back to her apartment soon. Hopefully. She said it's like prison in the nursing home. I brought her a bowl of spaghetti the other day. She enjoyed it very much. She started eating it faster especially after I told her what lunch was scheduled to be delivered - meatloaf and potatoes - the usual over there. I tasted some of her lunch at the last visit and didn't blame her for not eating and for losing her appetite. How is it that I can't eat today and I am writing this blog about food. Better stop. I'm gettting hungry by the letter.

Do you really want to know about our life? God is good and will get us through it all

2006-05-29T07:51:00.000-07:00

In the last couple of weeks I've been preparing for 4 new students. getting my mailing list in order for the new CCLC newsletter, figuring out how to be a vegetarian while inventing new and improved pureed soups, milk shakes and smoothies, watching a fairly high maintainence, but adorable baby girl once a week, fielding calls about how grandma's doing and wishing I could visit her more than once a week, taking estimates for the new concrete on the patio, attending our mom's group, and preparing a resume for a Russian speaking co-worker of my mom's who is moving and asked me to help out - all on top of being a stay at home mom. Matty is such a blessing. He helps me out so much! With that SMILE!!! And just being wonderful adorable lovable him!

I am feeling better in my stomach. Became a vegetarian and still drinking a lot of liquid food. I'm scheduled for an endoscopy tomorrow but I don't know if I'll be able to since I now have a sore throat and cough - thought it was allergies - sinus and everything, but it's turned into worse. To top everything off - Matty has pink eye. We have to put drops in his eyes 4 times a day. We are having the work on our patio today, so he wouldn't be able to go outside anyway, so we'll keep him in all day and wrestle with him. I don't know if you've ever had to put drops in a little one's eyes - let alone, wipe the gook off. But OH MY- it's a struggle. Oh well. We'll all be stronger after this, huh? Chris is sick too. Lovely situation.

Day two after surgery

2006-05-09T21:35:00.000-07:00

According to the PT today, Grandma did better on day 2 after hip surgery than most who are 20 years younger than her. Go grandma! She had a blood transfusion yesterday which gave her a good boost and will put her on the road to recovery much easier. The PT also encouraged us when she shared that her Italian grandmother also had hip surgery when she was Grandma's age and is now 100 years old. Grandma was making jokes and being her usual positive self today, so she was entertaining the PT and nursing staff and blessing them right and left. That's my Grandma!!! Great to see her so lively so soon.

liquid diet vs. an exploding stomach...hmmm

2006-05-09T21:06:00.000-07:00

I'm having blood work today an ultrasound tomorrow and another not so pleasant procedure on Thursday morning to see what's going on with my stomach. So it looks like I'm on liquids all week and practically fasting. I've been feeling ok though. Thanks for all your prayers. This is to keep Pilotmom and Pilotmom's neice in law nurse - you know who you are - "in the know".

update on Grandma

2006-05-09T10:38:00.000-07:00

To continue to keep Pilotmom "in the know", and whoever else is praying diligently for me and my family- Grandma had a blood transfusion yesterday because her iron was low. My mom still needs a lot of prayer. Good news: Mom found a good nursing home that's reserving a bed for Grandma to be transfered to either Wed or Thurs. My sister mom and I will be visiting Grandma today and tomorrow and taking turns watching all the kids (Sister's two boys and Matty) and then Thursday Matty will be with his Grandma (paternal) for the day while I have my 4th visit to the hosiptal for the week and will be having my procedure as mentioned in the "liquid diet" post. How's that for keeping you all in the loop. Not to mention - I haven't even mentioned that I watch the cutest little baby girl in the world twice a week so I won't be getting to do that this week with all this happening. More on her another time. She's soooo precious and fun for me and Matty!

when it rains it pours

2006-05-08T14:41:00.000-07:00

I had an incredibly painful experience at about the same time as my grandma's fall Saturday night (see below) - It just came all of a sudden and I cried out for my husband to get me pain killers. I couldn't move or breathe. The pain was so intense. So we called a 24 hr nurse, who thought it might be a gallbladder problem. I waited the night out with Vicodin and prayers. I went to urgent care the next day, while waiting for Grandma's surgery to be over and they gave me some more meds and said call the dr in the morning, which of course- he is not in until this afternoon, but in the meantime, the pain has subsided and I am not to eat sour cream and tortilla chips ever again! well at least until they fix whatever is wrong with me. What a weekend.

Matthew was the star of the urgent care waiting
room yesterday. My dad watched him in there and he was
waving and talking to everyone, touching all the
ladies purses and flirting with the little girls, and greeting
or saying "bye bye" to everyone who went through
the door. As we left, the whole room was disappointed
that he immediately ignored them all and wanted me,
but they all said goodbye to him like they'd been friends for
years. It was so sweet and my dad had been cracking up the
whole time I was in with the doctor. His mood was completely
different because of his grandson and he was impressed
by his personality and boldness. The people in the
room said he had talent - that he could really work a
room and had potential for a career in entertainment.
Oh my!

my amazing Grandmother

2006-05-08T14:39:00.000-07:00

I have some really hard news that had me in desperate tears with God Saturday night. My 91 year old grandmother just moved from my parent's house into an assisted living facility and fell on the first night at what was supposed to be the “better place” for her. After dinner she locked canes with someone else and went down. She was rushed to the hospital (which is right across the street) because she thought her leg could be broken. I was on the phone with my parents telling them of the extreme pain I'd been in for about 20 minutes (see above), when their other phone rang and they got the news about Grandma's fall. They were in the middle of their first dinner without having to feel the weight of the responsibility of caring for Grandma. They rushed me off the phone saying they had to finish their dinner and get down to the hospital. A couple hours later we got a call from them telling us that Grandma had broken her hip and will need surgery in the morning and will have to live at a skilled nursing home.

Chris and I prayed to God to use this situation for the good of those who love Him, as Grandma is certainly one of those, the rock of our family, the person who taught me to have faith in all situations and not to give up on our Lord who is
always with us for comfort, companionship, love and mercy. She survived the car crash that killed my grandfather 33 years ago. She had been in a full body cast and on life support but has lived on her own until this year and attributes it all to God's work and grace in her life. - So we prayed for Grandma's comfort and to be close to Jesus and that His will be done in this situation. We prayed for our whole family to be able to get through this and see God at work, since it has been a hard enough year and we all want to know what God is up to with Grandma and her life. He is in control and knows best, even when we think it would really be easier our way. We were all just so shocked that this happened and wish we could just back up and make it not to have happened, especially on her first night there. She didn’t even get to sleep in her new bed from Target that she was so excited about.

And I'm pretty worried about my mom's stress level and ability to get through this next challenge. Her words on the phone before hanging up for the night were heartbreaking, in light of all my mom has gone through over the past 5 months. First she said to me, "Please thank Chris for helping us move Grandma this morning. He was so much help and a great person to have around when you need someone to keep the mood up and the task going." Then she said, "We thought it was going to be a good day and now it wasn't." This was really hard to hear, and a very true statement. We were all hoping that Grandma was going to a place where she was going to be able to enjoy the last days of her life and have a repreive from the pain she had from her last fall (Jan) and her boredom and worsening dimensia symptoms - a place for her to make friends her own age, play scrabble and laugh and enjoy being old - to feel blessed in her old age, not cursed. Why do old people have to deteriorate and fall apart when they should be able to rest and relax and impart all their wisdom, love and experience on the younger generation???? I guess if there wasn't the pain and falling apart, they wouldn't slow down and would be
just as restless as we are.... only God knows why they
have to go through this torture. Some kind of metal
winning process. Funny that Grandma always makes the
joke "What do want for "this", a metal?"

So yes, we had a pretty crazy weekend, but faith building, to say the least. Grandma survived hip surgery surgery yesterday (Sun) and is going to be on the mend and ready to move into her new place. I’m working on talking my mom into investing in a nice wheelchair for her to get from her room to the dining area and maybe she’ll need a sign to wear that says “I can’t see, I can’t walk and I can’t hardly hear, so be NICE to me and don’t let me trip over your cane or I’ll hit you with mine” Now she has a hard road to get better, but at least she got through the surgery. She is such a strong person and an amazing example of who I’d like to be like. I don’t know that I’d wish her sufferings she’s had in her life on anyone really, but I really admire her faith in God, despite the hard life she’s lived. She still loves Him and finds joy and love and peace and blessings wherever she goes and whatever she does.

I was very proud of my mom yesterday. She was strong and clear minded and I gave her a little back massage after we found out Grandma was ok and I told her she did good. That's when mom said, "well they say it just makes you stronger. Everything makes you stonger" She has been through quite a bit with her mom. and is hanging in there
doing all that she needs to do. I love seeing how much love my mom truly has and realizing in my later years,
really since I moved out, how much she loves her family and and is willing to do anything for us. GO MOM! Please pray, if you haven't already figured out that my family needs it right now, that my mom can get through this next phase of taking care of her mom. She really needs to just take it one day at a time, as my sister wisely pointed out today, but has a hard time not thinking about the future and what the next step is for grandma. We're hopeful that she can move back to the assisted living place that is decorated so nicely and all the cute old ladies are hoping to make friends with the little new lady that fell on her first night there - but that is a while away, after she gets healed from this surgery. One step at a time. Hopefully one wheel at a time for grandma if she can get the wheelchair that my sister and I are hoping she'll LOVE! Blessings to all who are reading this. I hope my grandma is an inspiration to you too in whatever is going on for you. :)

Liquid diet, not so bad - as compared to an exploding stomach

2006-05-08T13:36:00.000-07:00

February- getting ready for Matty's first BD party

2006-05-05T06:33:00.000-07:00

Written March 31, 2006
Planning Matty's party was so much fun. I was so excited that my little baby was going to eat his first taste of chocolate cake and all the ice cream he wanted. I planned the theme based on the cake pattern and one of Matty's favorite toys this year: Rubber duckies. The invitations, cake, plates and napkins were duckies. It would have been cute to play duck duck goose and color a picture of a duckie, but the ages of the kids we invited were mostly under 2, so that wouldn't have really worked. I was also in a lot of pain that day- so I would have liked to have read a duckie book or sang the Wiggle's song "quack quack quack quack....cockadoodledooo", but I had to be in complete survival mode to get through the day. I think God was reminding me of the pain I had been in the year before while giving birth to my precious son - so it was a bitter sweet pain and a good way to get me to keep on the current plan to wait at least through the summer before thinking about getting pregnant again!

Well, we had 8 boys at the party - Matty's 2 cousins, 3 friends from his first church (Midtown) and 2 friends from the new church and Matty. And of course their parents and our personal event photographers were there aslo (our good friends John and Effie who are dabbling in professional photography gave us a "freebie") That was round one of the birthday extravaganza. 11:30-1:00. Then for the second half of the day- 5 grandparents, 2 aunts, an uncle, and 2 honorary aunties came. (The aunt and uncle who are the parents of the two cousins were faithfully there through both parties though. Can this be more confusing? :) 1:00-3:00

My number one computer activitiy of the month of February was getting Matty's first year of video footage edited and condensed down into 20 minutes of pure Matty Memorabilia! What a star! It was such a hit for the second half of his birthday for his grandparents, aunts, uncle and family friends to watch. They laughed and oooohed and ahhhed and made it totally worth all the late nights of painstakingly cutting and pasting and draging and watching and rewatching and putting the music and titles and just the right places.... you'd have no idea a 20 minute production could take 20 or so hours to accomplish unless you've also done video editing. I think I'm getting better at it though, probably most of that time was me learning how to do it.

Chris, Matty and I were so exhausted after the day- which lasted until 4:30, way past his second nap time. But it was worth it. He got many beautiful gifts and we were blessed to know that he is SOOOO loved. Everyone who came had been a special part of Matty's first year of life and it was great to celebrate him with them!

updating my blog

2006-03-31T06:14:00.000-08:00

Written March 31, 2006
I started to update my blog and it was a bit overwhelming since I haven't visited it for 5 months. Wow. I know some of you had been visiting it occassionally to see if there were any updates, but I have a feeling you must have abandoned ship by now. And I'd wanted to keep it as a record, in addition to my own personal journal and my scrapbooking pages, video and my memory book,of Matthew's growth and development and meaningful memories. Ok, when I listed it all out like that I realized it's pretty well documented, just in every media you can think of and in 5 different places, - oh, I forgot 2 others - my heart and my mind (not to mention my husband's, my parent's, my husband's parent's, my sister's, my really good friend's, and God's hearts and minds....) So, I don't think I'll be able to update the blog to the detail or extent that I had started it in. At least any time soon, that is. And I also don't think I'll be forgetting things I haven't written down. After discovering yesterday that I haven't written in my personal journal very regularly since Matty started crawling, which is right after the 7 mo birthday on the blog, I figured there must be a pattern. Aha! -
Sleeping, stationary baby = time to sit at the computer or hold a book to handwrite your every thought.
Crawling, walking, babbling, touching and discovering everything in sight baby = your life will never be the same and you watch every move he makes because you're just so amazed that this is what was actually inside your body for 9 months and is the most amazing, spectacular being you could ever be blessed with the chance to watch grow and experience the joys and pleasures of this life we live. YES! It's good to know I'm not just neglecting my blog - I have a legitimate reason for not having the chance to write.

Doesn't he nap you ask? Couldn't you write in the blog then? Or after he goes to bed at night? Ok. I'll answer that. Here's what I do during those times: Cook, clean, organize pictures of Matty, scrapbook with pictures of Matty, talk to God, talk to my sister or whoever else wants to hear about what Matty ate that day, sleep, watch TV, eat.... the list goes on. And why do I have time now? Couldn't sleep. And yesterday, when I got inspired to check the blog and start updating again, Matty was at his grandparent's house for the longest time ever during the day. It was the first time in 13 months that I've been alone in the house during the day (Chris has taken him to the store before, or his parent's house but that was for either a half hour store visit or I still left the house and did errands of tutored or something other than sit in a quiet house and not really know what to do with myself for 6 hours.)

So here I am, back to blogging and babbling and trying to be the witty writer that I'd like to think I am. I guess this desire to write in clever and thourough detail stems from my journalism background. I was editor of my high school news paper and then majored in journalism for a year before switching to child development. The skill of getting just the right word that would create the right impression for your audience, which takes more than just writing the first thing that comes to mind, at least for me, is so fascinating to me. Also I love the art of writing and the medium of the blog was/is something that I could totally get into if I had the kind of time that Dan seems to have. (He's my friend that I initially joked about having invented the blog because he was the first person from whom I and a couple of other people reading this blog had heard about blogs.) That man is hilarious and so good at getting to the core of what he wants to write about. He really has a gift. And he updates his blog like every 10 seconds it seems. I know I'm wordy, but if I spent time going back to revise what I have to say, I could tone it down to be like Dan's consice witt that seems to just come naturally. (That is how my husband is. He talks the way I write. Chris and Dan are so alike. It is a shame we don't live near them anymore to have dinner with him and his wife because we always went out of there laughing the whole way home at the way he and Dan think alike and Melinda and I are so in sinc from being friends since 5th grade.)

So, where do you think Dan gets the time to do such a complete and incredible and hilarious and well thought out, amazingly titled blog? Oh yeah, he sits at a computer all day and any chance he gets at home and he has NO TODDLER. ha ha . I don't even have time to read his blog (Chris and his wife tell me bits and pieces about it) let alone write with that kind of flare and creativity. Matthew would be pulling at the mouse, wanting to sit on my lap to play on the keys, moaning and whining that I'm not playing with him because I'm working on that silly screen again (this is what he did when I worked on the video project for his 1st birthday) and my blog would look like this JL:KEDFJWPOEIR ]-2374 [ARSPLSDIHF [O8afdlksjfoia yoing,mfdn iuesnriugjmno jfdslkgj uetsyjkgs j klsujks sk fdpsois. Well I wouldn't be surprised if my genius child could read and write his own language. That's about what he says all the time.... ha ha. I guess he could tell I was writing about him because he just woke up and is calling for his breakfast.

I may not be the amazing and perfect blogger that Dan is, but I'll get the details filled in when I get to it and it will be very cool for Matthew to see what fun things I shared about him to his cyber/ audience and fans and whoever chooses to read this online. I've been printing some of the entries out and will put them in his scrapbook. I will say this - (oooh he went back to sleep - good boy) : I am so happy to be starting another incredibly fullfilling day with my most adorable, precious, loving, cuddly, discovering, amazing son who I would never trade for all the time in the world to sit in front of a computer and blog. What an undescribable blessing that keeps on giving! I SOOOOO love being a mom. Have I mentioned that? And I'm so amazed at the connection, communication and deep bond that Matthew and I already have that is just getting stronger as he grows in his understanding of the world around him and starting to communicate his needs and wants in words and motions, instead of just cries. They're words and motions that only I really get and I can translate to my husband who just isn't around him enough to fully study them and acquire the Matty language of "I want that" and "I don't want that".

Thanks for your patience - those of you who are really wanting me to blog and are now getting this big EXPLOSION of updates and back logs of my life. Keep checking. There's more fun to come. :) And I'm going to try to post some pictures again soon too. :)

Happy 7 month Birthday Matty!!!!

2005-10-04T20:47:00.000-07:00

For Matty's 7 month birthday he received and gave his dad and I a beautiful present: he slept through the night for a full 12 hours last night!!!!! Amazing sleep miracle of the life of Mr. Matthew Voudouris - sleep master extravaganzer.... it's a long answer as to how he did that, and not the time to explain - see reasons for this below in the typer's block entry - but just know that we're SOOOO PROUD OF OUR LITTLE GUY!!! And thankful to God for prayers of great proportions answered in this arena ---- that coming from a new mom who's had 7 full months of irregular sleep, to say the least (not to mention the not sleeping periods of my pregnancy) but I'm not complaining... I actually enjoyed the middle of the night feedings as someone on this blog advised me to do before giving birth to Matty. And, I didn't even get the sleep I could have gotten last night because I was too busy watching Matthew sleep to see if he was going to wake up and how he was dealing with not waking up when he usually was waking up and I didn't want to get so deep into my sleep that I wasn't ready when he was going to wake up so I was up from 4:30-6am as you can see with so much to do in my brain... I know. I'm a little odd... but sleep has become a relative thing that doesn't have to be at night for me any more... well, until now that it can be again - I also missed him in the middle of the night, if you can believe that. So instead of getting to cuddle and feed him and rock him back to sleep, all I could do was look at him and long to hold him, but also marvel at his sleeping sleeping sleeping and rolling and fidgeting and not waking up... oh that's my boy!! Question of the week--- how long will this last? Is it a fluke or the real thing to rest in and expect? He's slept 8-9 hours through before, but then he reverted to waking up 1-3 times per night, so I don't want to get my hopes up just yet, but as I said, what a beautiful 7mo birthday marker to remember and celebrate for years to come.... Oct 4th, the day of the sleep miracle...

typer's, not writer's block...

2005-10-04T20:34:00.000-07:00

I have a lot to update on the blog, but can;t really do so very effectively because of my hurt wrist that's been in a cast for 3 weeks and now in a full-time brace and needs PT for 4 weeks... so typing with one hand or the occasional cheat job with both and effectively wearing the hurt one out in the process thus prolonging the healing process is not conducive to writing the lengthy blog entries that I have stored up in my juicy journal in my head ----therefore, I write this entry to say that there are a plentiful of potential entries to come and some super exciting newses to report and record... so please pray for the healing time on my wrist to be shortened or my right handed typing skills to improve - actually I'd prefer the first prayer and for the healing to be complete and thorough so I can go back to doing a number of other essential things without having to use one hand or compromising the strength and pain of the left - like bathing, changing, playing with, lifting or holding Matty - of cause I'm doing all those things, but as described in that last sentence there about the compromise etc... I think one handed typing causes me to have run-on sentences galore! Stay tuned for the Very exciting newses... are you in suspense or what???

The tears finally came

2005-08-29T09:28:00.000-07:00

I had just told our Wed night prayer group that I hadn't been able to cry about our church closing up to that point. I was still in shock by the news and the last meeting. I predicted that it would "hit" me like a ton of bricks when we started the process of visiting churches and trying to fit in. That prediction didn't take long to come true. Sunday morning Chris and I ventured out to the first church we'd visit since the closing of Midtown Community. After dropping Matthew off at the nursery with a woman who said she runs her own day care business at home and that Matthew was the only infant so far in there for the day, we proceeded to the sanctuary where we wondered if we'd see the couple who we knew went to that church. And there they were in the lobby. They are friends with our pastor and his wife, so they knew exactly why we were there and what was going on in our lives. As soon as the words "This is the first church we've visited since Midtown closed" came out of my mouth, so did the tears start welling up in my eyes. I told the woman of that couple that, "I'm a crier and I haven't cried yet. So I'll probably cry here". She assured me that it was fine because she cries every Sunday anyway, during the music time. So we walk in and it's a decent enough sanctuary - comfortable pews, nice enough looking people, familiar songs to worship to - but the realization that we would never again go to the church that was our home for the past 7 years came tumbling into my mind and I lost it. I cried and wept through 3-4 songs, a message from some builder and archetect telling about the reconstruction of some classrooms, and a video about missions to Hmong villages. A very kind woman came and asked if I wanted to go up front for prayer during the music. I said fine and went and hugged the new friend I had met through my pastor's wife. She was one of the prayer ministers in the front. She was crying too, and telling me she was sorry and asked God what He was doing. Two other women came and huddled with us and prayed for me. They didn't know why or for what they were praying, but God did. I knew my tears were mostly out of sadness for not ever being able to have Midtown again, but also in preparation for what God would do next, so they weren't entirely bitter tears - but definitely emotional and enough for me to shake and let them pour out.

I couldn't concentrate for a message from the book of Esther. The pastor seemed like he was explaining it well and telling a very good story at that (I've read it before - it's good) but it was lost on me. So I told Chris I'd get some water and check on Matty. He was doing fine in the nursery. Sitting up and playing with some toys and some other kids. There was one boy who was trying to hug and kiss him, as he wailed a bit (when he does that it's hard to tell if he's upset or just testing his lungs out). He smiled immediately when he saw me. I let him play a bit more and talked to the nursery workers and then I gave him a drink and let him fall asleep in my arms. That was comforting for both of us, as it usually is. Later, when I got back to the church and the service was over, I learned that the boy who was hugging and kissing Matty in the nursery was the son of the woman who prayed and cried with me. Chris has known them for 5 years, so we talked for them a bit, took a rain check on their very generous invitation for lunch and swimming at their house because we had plans for my dad's BD that afternoon, and proceeded home to figure out what to do after the morning at the first church we visited. My husband kept asking if I was ok. He always does that when I cry. I told him I was fine, but got a good gripe out that "I DON'T LIKE CHURCH IN THE MORNING" I felt like my whole day was "discombobulated" ... I decided to take a nap with Matty and hopefully wake up in a better mood.... This morning I came to the conclusion that I STILL DON'T LIKE CHURCH IN THE MORNING> But I'm willing to wait and see what God has for us. What other choice do I have?

Andiamo - my "moving on" message to the church

2005-08-29T09:05:00.000-07:00

This is the email I sent out to the members of our church a couple days before our last meeting together, which was a dinner celebration at a restaurant called "Andiamo" where we would share memories and "say goodbye to Midtown Community" with current and former members of our church.

Aug. 18th, 2005

Dear Midtowners,

Last night many of us met at our house to share memories and discovered many things God has done for us during our time at Midtown. For those who were and weren’t there,I wanted to send out a bit of encouragement in light of the emotional meeting, and urge you to begin the process of moving on:

Most of you are probably completely unaware of how appropriate it is for us to go to the restaurant we’re going to on Sunday night. Andiamo is Italian for “Let’s go!” and that is exactly what our church community is being called to do. God seems to be giving us no other choice but to GO. I admit is hard to accept that, and had I been given the option of keeping Midtown together, I would have wanted to do so. Last night really helped to realize that Midtown was a vessel that God used to work in and through us for a time. He knew from the beginning of time that this little body of believers would be disbanding and dispersing throughout to other churches and He has a plan and a place for us all. You really never know, it could even be better than anything Midtown was capable of providing for us. I know that’s hard to believe right now, as we mourn the closing of our church. I think we just might have been a little too comfortable there. The time in my life when God worked the most is when I was the most uncomfortable, when lived in a foreign country and nothing was familiar to me. I had no choice but to look to God to provide for my every need and He did so, amazingly. That is what He isgoing to do for us now. He’s calling us out of ourcomfortable church life and community where everyone knows everyone and we’ve learned to be completely comfortable with each other. But the cool thing is that He’s not leaving us on our own to figure things out. Just as He was so with us while we were at Midtown, He is joining us all in our new pursuits.He’s the leader saying to us all, “Andiamo” - “Let’s go!” – out into the unknown, into the uncomfortableand possibly even the unbelievable so that we can experience and depend on Him more and more than ever before. As we go out into the foreign world of churches that don’t meet at 4:30 in the afternoon,with people who don’t know us and may not even care if we show up from week to week. (we might not even get snack before and after church, AHHH), God is going to be working in all of us, individually and collectively. Amazing things are going to happen. You just wait and see…Maybe you have a vision or some ideas about where God saying “Let’s go”… if so, here’s a forum to bring those visions to: Chris and I announced last night that we want to continue to open our house on Wed evenings at 7pm for prayer and discussion while our church is in the interim of finding new churches and other transitions.Please come to share how God is working in and throughyou, to pray for the church search and to update us on the joys and trials of this process. Blessings, France

PS> See you Sunday – Andiamo Midtown! Dio te benedice (Italian for “God bless you)

Our church closed it's doors

2005-08-29T08:43:00.000-07:00

After 7 years of service to our church, our pastor announced his resignation on the night of Matthew's dedication to the Lord. He had been praying about it for about a year and was preparing for the birth of his second child (who was born the very next morning at 3:08am - his wife was in the beginnings of labor at the dedication and during the church meeting - very exciting). There were many reasons for his resigning, mainly that he didn't feel he was called any longer to be our pastor, he also needed more money than we had as a church to support his family. Due to the lack of money in our church and members leaving for various reasons - to move to other cities for jobs or graduate school, to go to churches with bigger children's programs or ones that meet in the morning or closer to their homes - it was evident that we wouldn't be able to hire a new pastor, at least one who would want to work for pretzels (the always present snack at our church). So with two weeks notice, a lot of tears and explanation, it was announced that Midtown Community as we know it would no longer exist. This is the church where my husband and I met, where we worshipped for 7 years, where we grew in our faith, our devotion and service to Christ, where we loved and served and celebrated with so many people who were like family to us.
When I heard the news, I wasn't entirely surprised, but disappointed. When Matthew was born, Chris and I had talked about not wanting to leave to find another church, as so many other parents had done because the service was at 4:30 in the afternoon and ended well into the time they needed to put their kids to bed. Not only was that not the case for us (Matty's bedtime is 9pm), but we decided we could sacrifice his schedule for one day so that we could still worship in our prefered location. Little did we know that we wouldn't have a choice, just 5 1/2 months later.

Surprisingly, I didn't cry. I waited for the tears. Even tried to make them cry, but God was giving me the vibes that He knew what was going on and that He had a plan bigger than we could imagine.

Still answering the previous prayer

2005-08-29T08:40:00.000-07:00

It turns out, and I haven't gotten the whole story yet, but the teacher I met on the plane home from San Diego is not going to work out after all to join my staff. She said she prayed about it and it doesn't quite fit into her schedule at this time. I was pretty disappointed, but I guess it means God hasn't finished answering my prayer on this just yet. So I'm back to square one. I'm putting my ad in with God and possibly at the local school district. In the meantime, Matty will be my assistant teacher and his dad and grandma will watch him when they can.

Our trip to SD

2005-08-22T08:40:00.000-07:00

San Diego was amazing. It's so beautiful there. A great place for vacation, but expensive to live and a lot of traffic. It was hard to come home to the heat, but home is home. We visited a lot of friends I hadn’t seen in a while, including two little ones for Matthew to play with. My friend I’ve known since kindergarten lives there with her husband and 2 1/2 year old son. He was adorable! He gave me two really big bear hugs in a row and a kiss and a zerbert. After that we were friends for life. He even gave Matthew hugs and kisses. Matthew’s were very wet back. It was great to catch up and see them after 2 years since our last face to face visit at our 10 year reunion. Old friends are wonderful because they know you’re history and see where you are and appreciate the changes and the stuff that’s remained and appreciate it all that much more.

We stayed with a former roommate of mine, who was also a bridesmaid at my wedding. It was the first time she'd met Matthew and she just adored him. She was so incredibly energetic and entertaining for him that he was attached instantly. Now it's her turn to visit to stay in touch with her new everchanging and growing friend.

My traveling companion was incredibly helpful and available every step of the way with Matthew. We made a great team and she really enjoyed being so involved with taking care of Matty as we traveled. I wouldn't have wanted anyone else with me for the perfect trip that we had.

answered prayer

2005-08-22T08:20:00.000-07:00

You're never going to believe this. I only just started SAYING I was going to look for a new teacher to hire. I considered putting an ad in the local paper, but my dad warned against it. Too many calls to try to screen through. So I was going to call the School District office or maybe put a flyer up at the coffee shop I meet some students at… I hadn’t really committed to any of those ideas, but have been praying and asking others to do so. And I didn’t think I’d really need to find a new teacher for at least a couple of months. I was going to hold for the perfect fit. Turns out, all I had to do to find the right one for the job was go to San Diego and back. We shared a row with someone who we asked to take our picture on our flight home. She told us she remembered us from our flight to San Diego. Matthew is unforgettable. We got to talking and as soon as she said she was a teacher in El Dorado Hills I asked her if she might know anyone I could a part time tutoring job in Folsom. It turned out she did know someone. Herself. She has since sent me her resume and I am so impressed. She is exactly what I've been looking for and more! I'm going to "interview" her on Tuesday, but she pretty much has the job. She is a substitute teacher in the area and was looking for part time work after school. That’s what I have for her. And it saves me from having to drive 20 minutes and get my husband or mom to watch Matty. I would have been away from Matty for 3 hours at a time to do this job, or I took him with me which is getting increasingly harder to do as he gets more squiggly and makes all kinds of noises and requests for my full attention. The two students were wanting to meet twice a week for two hours each and there was no way I was going to pull that off for long. So hiring this teacher will provide for them very nicely and keep me with my sweet boy. I can also tutor from home more during his naps, as students arise. God is so good! He is the only one who could have so perfectly arranged that meeting.

I also appreciate the other great teachers I have on my staff. This first of which I hired in June has broken me in quite nicely as an employer. Or maybe I should say has spoiled me. I appreciate you so much. She always goes above and beyond my expectations and instructions as a teacher! And although she's starting student teaching this week and I thought I'd lose her for most of my students, she's grown so attached and dedicated to them that she's worked her schedule out so that she can still teach each of the students she's had all summer. I'm giving her EMPLOYEE of the MONTH for that!

Matthew's memoirs at 5 months

2005-08-16T22:07:00.000-07:00

Aug 4, 2005

I get so excited when the sleeping is over. It means another chance to practice my rolling over. I've just got to figure out how to get my arm out after I land. It kept getting stuck yesterday, but if I lift my butt up just the right amount and push my head into the blanket and grunt and breathe really heavy, I could JUST lift the arm out from under me. I did it. I know. I'll keep doing this all day today until I get it. If I cry enough after I get on to my tummy, then my Mom will come turn me back to my back so I can try again. I've got to get this down by the end of the day because tomorrow I want to work on kicking my legs while I'm on my stomach to see if I can move to get my toys all by myself. My parents say I look like I'm swimming to nowhere when I do that, but not for long. I'm determined to be able to get somewhere.

Aug 6, 2005
Today I tasted a new cereal, barley. My mama tasted it too and she didn't seem to like it. But I thought, yum yum. Bring it on. She said something about adding a bannana to it sometime soon, which seems ok to me. We'll see. I'm liking this slimy stuff in my mouth though. It's fun to smear it all over my face. And I figured out how to grab the bowl when Mom isn't looking and dump it all over my high chair tray or in my lap. That gets me a bath everytime! And since I figured out how to splash in the tub it's even better than ever.

Mama's been helping me sit up on my own. WOW. I didn't know I could do that until she balanced me out like she did. We've been doing more and more of it and it's so great not to have to lay down all the time or be tied up in that bouncer chair to sit. I was always propped up against the couch and would fall over if Mama didn't hold me there. But now, I can sit on my own for at least 2-3 minutes and I even figured out how to hold myself with my hands on the floor and pick up toys to put in my mouth and everything.

Aug 7, 2005

Today there were SO many people at my house. It was really loud and entertaining, because everyone kept wanting to hold me and make silly noises at me. My grandpas do that the most. They were extra funny today because they were doing it at the same time. And everyone was really impressed with my rolling over and sitting up. I was happy to show off my new moves, as Mama calls them. Then we went to church and I got to be up front with Mom and Dad and the Godparents. Everyone kept talking about me and reading nice things they wrote. And the really tall pastor put some slimy stuff on me and told me I was going to do God's work. I was ok with that. My parents have told me that before. It seemed like the whole day was for me. I felt so special.

Aug 10, 2005
I just love having Daddy home during the day lately. He took vacation for the last 2 weeks. I can tell he thinks I'm special and he helps Mommy out even more now. He comes to get me in the morning and brings me to drink Mama's milk. She really likes that. We went to the ocean together. Mom and Dad said it was where they got engaged and it's a good thing they did that because then they made me. It was relaxing to hear the waves and see the big blue water. It reminded me of my bear at home that makes the sounds at night that make me sleep. We didn't sleep at the ocean though. We just took pictures and walked around.

Aug 14, 2005
We hung out with my big cousin for the whole weekend. It was Great Grandma's 91st birthday party. She loves me so much. She's always telling me how beautiful I am and lets me hold her soft hand as tight as I want. She also sings to me. That's so sweet of her. After the party, my cousin spent the night at our house. He's so funny. I just love looking at him. It's great to have someone around who isn't quite as big as my mom and dad and seems to really know how to play. He jumps like a frog and pushes trucks and cars and trains around. I think I'll like to do that too, when I get old enough. It's funny when we both laugh at the same time when Mommy does that cool sound and takes our picture together. They say I'm getting another cousin and a new God-brother or sister soon and I get to be the big kid this time. That should be neat.

Well, I better go work on my moves so I can show the new kids how it's done. I'm trying to perfect getting from sitting position to laying down. It's about as frustrating as that arm getting stuck, but luckily Mom and Dad come running to give me another chance whenever I scream just the right amount. They're so predictable.

Matthew was dedicated to the Lord on Aug 7th 2005

2005-08-16T22:04:00.000-07:00

Here is a prayer I wrote for Matthew's dedication. It was a beautiful ceremony and we were blessed that all of our family was able to come. Matthew even stayed quiet and was adorably attentive while he was being held in front of all the people. We were so proud of him.

Based on Galatians 5:22

These things we pray over Matthew.

May he know the love of Christ and experience
the joy of being a Christian.

May the peace and patience of God
be with him as he faces the challenges of life.

May kindness and goodness and gentleness
be pillars of his character.

Give him self-control as his parents
discipline him and he learns to do what is right.

And lastly we pray for the faithfulness Matthew will need to walk closely
with the Lord and do His will.
Amen.

Matty's first plane ride

2005-07-24T04:18:00.000-07:00

We took a trip to LA in June and were incredibly proud of our mellow baby boy who was able to sleep through the take off and landing. There were other babies screaming on that flight, but ours was dreaming. The way home was not as smooth, but he did get through it better than his mom, who was ready to scream. I had a slight nasal issue that turned into one of the worst headaches I've ever had. The pressure was so intense, I thought my head was going to explode. I was praying that was no where near the kind of experience Matty was having. He cried a little, but survived. I had much longer head cold than I'd expected after that.

Our trip was initially to go to the wedding of one of my students. She is Ukrainian so the ceremony was spoken entirely in Russian. I was happy to be able to translate it to Chris. He couldn't believe how many times the marriage was blessed. I had to say "I'm not making this up. The pastor is saying 'I bless this marriage, Lord' again and again and again." I think it made us wonder if our marriage had been prayed over enough. Then the parents came up to pray and the couple prayed for themselves. Matty slept through the whole thing. Then when it came time for the reception, we mistakenly sat at a table by ourselves and some older women sat down, who I predicted would not know any English. We quickly offered our seats to the rest of their party and waited for a younger crowd to offer us to sit with them. We were pleased with the table that chose us and they enjoyed Matthew as well.

Before the wedding, we were able to spend time with many sets of friends of ours who had babies we hadn't met yet. My best friend from high school and her 1 year old daughter joined us for lunch on Friday. My husband's college roommate, his wife and 17 month old son had us over their place the next day. And a friend of mine offered her place to us while she, her husband and 7 month old baby had a wedding to go to in our town. That was so generous. We did have a great time with them before they left for the long drive (we suggested flying next time) and Matty and their son Jake became good friends. "This is your best friend. You love each other!" We kept telling them. It's pretty great to be able to choose my son's friends for him. I'll post the pictures from this trip soon. I was having trouble transfering them for some reason.

A growing boy!

2005-07-21T21:10:00.000-07:00

Matthew weighed twice his birth weight at his 4 month appointment and had grown 6 inches. He is in the 90th percentile for weight for his age. He really likes his mommy's milk, I guess! Now he has started eating rice cereal. He's still getting used to eating with a spoon and sitting in his high chair. He gets confused sometimes and tries to eat his bib, but he'll learn.

Matty is addicted to swaddling. He sleeps all wrapped up like a burrito and has been doing so since he came home from the hospital. The nurses there showed us how to do it and I was encouraged by our friends to continue doing so. And to read the book "Happiest Baby on the Block" which describes why you should do this in the first 3 months. He is now 41/2 months and connot seem to be weened off. We tried it one night and he woke up almost every hour. Needless to say he was not the happiest baby on the block that day, nor was I the happiest mommy. I may have to swaddle him the rest of his life, if that's the result we get from not doing it. Oh, I hear him crying now. I'll have to write more later. Check out his new pictures in the shutterfly website. Click on this link or copy and paste it into your browser. http://share.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=EeANWbhi5aMXDvg . I should learn how to get the pictures directly on my blog, but that hasn't happened yet. I guess I don't have the patience, time or priority to learn how. This works for now, right?

A Day in the Life of Matthew at 3 Months Old

2005-05-20T10:25:00.000-07:00

It worked. I only had to cry for a couple of seconds and she appeared. I love how that works every time. Now she's unwrapping me from the blankets, what's left of them anyway from my kicking most of them off. And she's smiling and talking to me like she always does. She's telling me "Good morning. I love you Matthew." How nice is that to wake up to? I'll smile and make all the faces I can think of and then she's bound to pick me up. I get to eat right away. Yum yum. Mommy's milk. It's nice to have someone to talk to after a meal. "Gooo garrrr, maa-maaa. goooey gaaaa. Maaaaa." Time to get dressed. I wonder what she'll choose for me today. I hope it's a baseball outfit. I like dreaming about my baseball days. We went to that game the other day and that looked like a fun game. I could run someday like that.

Wow. She's wiping me and getting all the soggy slop out of my diaper. Thank you so much! Maybe I'll even get a bath today. I'll get to kick and soak in the warm water that feels like my previous home. And it smells really good too. Nope, doesn't look like bath day. Here comes the clothes. Oh good, it's a snap in the front outfit so it doesn't have to go over my head. I can look at my mommy all I want while she does this. And I can kick on the changing table, swish swish. What a cool sound.

I guess we're going out now. Where will it be today? Target? There's new clothes and toys for me there. Out to lunch? People smile and tell my mom how cute I am there. Or will we go see the grandparents? They're nice, but they don't hold me quite like my mom. I'll have to scream loud enough to get mom to come get me every 5 or 6 minutes. Oh well. They do make me laugh sometimes. Maybe I'll like that when I'm older, when they don't have to hold me for everything.

Well we're in the car now. It's jiggling my head. That's the way I like it. Oh, no. It stopped. Now I have to scream loud and see if that makes it go again. I hate when it stops. She's not listening. Why doesn't she do anything? This is not as effective as it is in the house. Or at the grandparents houses. What do I do now? I guess I'll just keep screaming. Good. It worked. We're moving again. Ahhhh... it's like a little massage. And so fun. Moving moving... hey. Quit stopping. "AHHH! AHHHHAAA HHAAAA!!!" Worked again. Good thing my voice is loud. I could do this all day. But I'll try not to. I heard mommy telling someone she doesn't like when I cry that much. It makes her want to cry too.

I can't wait for Daddy to get home. He's so strong. I like how he holds me and rocks me sometimes too. And he tells me thank you for giving him a work out. That's nice. He's also very nice to my mommy. I'm glad about that because she deserves it. She works so hard to make me happy and well fed. Mmmm mmmm. More of that milk. I'll take all I can get! I've heard people say that I'm getting chubby. I don't know if that's a good thing, but Daddy said it's my job to eat and grow, so I'll just keep doing my job, reguardless of what they say. And that milk is so yummy. More more more please...

How did I end up here? In my crib again? I'll just suck on my thumb a little. That's nice. But where's Mommy? I better scream for her. Just a little though. It doesn't take much for her to come running to come keep me company. "Hi Sweetie Pie. You woke up!" Oh, she loves me so much! And now I get to have some more milk!

Maybe she'll put me on my tummy so I can get my neck muscles stronger. Or there'll be some toys on the blanket for me to listen to or look at. Sometimes she puts them in my hand and I shake them myself. That's fun.

I feel myself getting sleepy again. I'm not ready for bed. I'll just cry. Maybe that will wake me up. Oh, why is she rocking me? That's going to put me to sleep. It's not time. Daddy's turn. When did he get home? Yes. He'll keep me up. He ... oh, what's this? Mommy's telling him how to rock me like she does. I'm in for it. I'll be asleep in...

It must be time for more milk. It's still dark out. But my covers are being unwrapped and Mommy is standing over me, rubbing her eyes. Sure, I'll take a middle of the night snack. Then maybe even a daiper change. Thanks. Then I'll gladly be wrapped back up again and go to sleep. What a great life I have. "Sweet dreams Matthew. I love you." I love you too Mommy. So nice of her to get up for me. She really does love me.

My life lately

2005-05-19T04:41:00.000-07:00

As you can see by my lack of blogging, I've been extremely wrapped up in other things, mainly spending every waking moment enjoying my baby boy. Let me just say that I simply love my life! My husband and son are the epitome of dreams come true and I bask in the glow of God's blessings over me because of all that he has provided. Matthew is blessed to have both sets of grandparents living close by. The grandpas like to make funny noises for his entertainment pleasures and the grandmas love to hold and kiss him and listen to him coo and smile at them. I've been tutoring, about 5-6 hours per week. This has been great to keep my students current and also to give Matthew some time with his grandmothers. They have each been coming one day a week to watch him while I tutor. He also is an easy enough baby for me to tutor even when they aren't here. I just hold him, or let him swing or sleep. Mostly I teach ESL students who need conversational practice, so it's sort of like hanging out with friends, except I get paid and I'm constantly correcting their grammar and giving them homework assignments and spelling tests. I try not to do that with my friends... ha ha.

Matthew and I also go out to lunch and shopping often, to get out of the house and let other people see him. Wherever I go, people smile. Sometimes I feel like a movie star. But really it's just Matty's adorable face and magnetic personality that causes strangers faces to light up and stop in their tracks. I think he's making people's day all the time just by being who he is, a precious and extremely cute and expressive baby.

If we're not eating or shopping, visiting with granparents (my 91 year old grandma also enjoys our visits to her house) or tutoring, then we just sit around and stare into each other's eyes and make each other laugh. I am still enthralled by Matthew's every move and loving every minute of being his mom. Stay tuned for my next blurb on Matty's growth and exciting developments...

Matthew's First Month

2005-04-11T20:32:00.000-07:00

It's really hard to believe Matty is already 5 weeks old. He has grown so much too. His arms and legs have filled out, he's much longer and his cheeks are just a little bit chubbier. He's still quite adorable. Check out some of the changes for yourself. Click the following link for shutterfly. com and view more of the ever so mellow Matthew.

http://share.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=EeANWbhi5aMXDlI

Happy Birthday to Me!

2005-03-15T16:17:00.000-08:00

Today is my 30th birthday. I couldn't have asked for a better birthday present if I'd tried. What would you like for your birthday? God asked me. A baby boy please. Ok, I'll see what I can do.

He is an angel. A gift from God. That is what his name means too. Matthew Matthew Matthew. Oh how I love you.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Do not come between a mother and her child

2005-03-12T07:34:00.000-08:00

I am completely blown away by the connection that I've already established with this amazing little boy. We bonded beyond recognition in utero. Everyday I notice something that I already knew about him, since we've been hanging out together for months and months already. A couple of days ago I woke up in the middle of the night and screamed at the pain I felt in my uterus and breasts. I told Chris, "I need the baby. Bring me the baby. I miss him so much." As soon as he brought Matthew to me, I was soothed and he was very clingy too. I asked Chris later if it had been Matthew who screamed or me. He said Matthew was completely peaceful in his crib when he got to the room. It was my need for HIM that caused that reuniting of mother and child. WOW! It is really powerful.

pictures of Matty

2005-03-11T18:13:00.000-08:00

Click on the following link to see our online family photos. We'll add more as we get them. There are over 200 so far in the camara, but these were the best of the best. And do you really want to see all 200? I would, but I'm the mom! I can't sleep because I have to look at how cute he is.

If the link doesn't work, then copy and paste it into your browser and push GO.

http://share.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=EeANWbhi5aMXDhY

Matthew, the genius - at 4 days old

2005-03-09T04:57:00.000-08:00

I realized tonight that if he sleeps in fetal position in the boppy in the big crib by himself and holds the binky with his hand propped on the boppy, he doesn't cry for hours and sleeps sleeps sleeps... We had to hold him all the other nights because he wouldn't stay laying in his crib or craddle for more than 2 min. He'd SCREAM. We thought it was for the heart beat and warmth of his parents, which very well may be true. I like that thought. And it wasn't just Mommy's heart. Daddy's works so well too. (Or anyone else who holds him for that matter.) But I couldn't sleep that way. Chris could almost sleep that way. I hadn't slept for 4 days. FINALLY! Tonight with the boppy realization I had 2, then 2 more hours sleep. I could be sleeping now and get 2 more until we get up to bring him to the doctor. That's 6 in one night. More than I've had in the 4 days since he was born. Our child is SO smart! He's eating and sleeping and pooping and doing all these things like clockwork and teaching his parents how it's done!

Introducing Matthew Noah

2005-03-08T18:00:00.000-08:00

Matthew Noah was born Friday, March 4 2005 at 4:33pm. He was 8 lb 10 oz and 20 in long. Mom and baby are feeling fabulous and loving finally seeing each other. Both his parents are so amazed he is theirs. He is perfect!

Matthew wants to thank you all for the prayers and love. It means so much to him and he can't wait to meet you all.

As he sits here watching his mommy type, he wonders who will be reading about him and who will be as excited as he is to know he's in the world, healthy, happy and eating more than ever.

The womb has been evacuated, just in time. No prorated rent for the extended lease period. And was that Mom person so right! The new accomodations are SOOO much roomier and prettier and there's LOVE everywhere he looks.

Winner

2005-03-08T17:30:00.000-08:00

John Lee is the winner of the baby pool. He is the only person who predicted Friday March 4th. Although he bent the rules a bit and predicted 2 times, he was still closest with those two guesses. He would like to give the second runner up a shot at the prize, however, for his own reasons.

So, second runner ups was a tie between Thursday at 11:45pm, guessed by Dan, and Saturday, guessed by Sarah. Let it be known that Mom is SOOOO glad you two were wrong about the length of labor. They said 22 and 20 hours. It was thankfully only 12!

We'll be in contact about your prizes Dan and Sarah. Thanks to everyone else for playing.

Notice to evacuate

2005-02-26T06:37:00.000-08:00

February 26, 2005

Dear Matthew,

This is your official eviction notice. You have exactly one week from today to evacuate the premises. These terms were stated in the original lease, so don’t try to tell me you didn’t see this coming. You’ve had a wonderful stay so far. No landlord could ask for a better tenant. You’re entertaining (an interesting tumbling act that you’ve come to perfect), you don’t eat much, you sleep at odd times, but you are very quite when you’re awake. I won’t hold the pains and discomfort against you, I know the space has been very limited, but it’s all I had to offer you for the nine months (plus this extra week) of your lease time. Just so you know, there’s no reason to take the whole week to finish packing and moving out. I’ll do what I can to help, but it might not be without a lot of screaming. Can’t say you haven’t been warned.

In case you’re worried about where you’re going to live next, that’s all taken care of. You have a great room, all to yourself when you get here. It’s decorated with love and care and filled with toys, really soft blankets, a crib that will keep you safe while you sleep, musical interludes, a great changing station for your diapering needs, PLUS, you’ll have full reign of the rest of the house. There’s a place for you to sit and be entertained in every room. Be it the living room where your swing is, the family room and kitchen where there a high chair and a play pen are waiting for you and a cradle in your parent’s room. Your transportation arrangements are also quite convenient. A stroller and car seat are at your disposal with excellent, personal drivers to get you wherever you need to go. Speaking of your drivers, these are your OH SO GENEROUS and loving caretakers who will be allowing you to live with them for the next 18-? years rent free. You will be well fed, bathed, diapered, kissed and unimaginably and unconditionally loved. All your needs will be taken care of and again, did I mention at no cost to you whatsoever? You don’t even have to look for a job.

So any time you’re ready to make your first appearance (sometime in the next week), we’re waiting for you with open arms to love you forever and teach you all about life in this world.

Love, (with hugs and kisses - that you’ll soon be able to feel and love)

Your mom

PS. Like I’ve been telling you all along, there’s lots of other little people who are waiting to be your friends. There’s your cousin Gino, and buddies Xander, Max, Drew, Jack and Jacob (those are the guys) … and then there’s the pretty girls too, Kayla and Beth … the whole fresh gang of newcomers just waiting for the next member of their club. And the GRANDPARENTS. WOW. You have no idea…do you feel the love? Oh I felt a kick. That must mean you’re getting a clue. See you soon, buddy. Love you!

Baby Pool

2005-02-23T15:12:00.000-08:00

Here's where you enter your predictions! Just click on the comments and let us know the day and time you think the baby will be born. Bonus questions: how long will my labor be and what is the middle name?

Expanding my business

2005-02-01T11:18:00.000-08:00

I've decided to hire a staff of teachers for my business. Still trying to get the kinks out and starting out by hiring friends, but it should be interesting. You can check out my business blog at www.creativeconnections.blogspot.com Any comments or suggestions are welcome. Thanks in advance.

Thanking God for HIS Timing

2005-02-01T10:57:00.000-08:00

We were having breakfast Saturday morning when my husband showed me a picture in the paper of two houses with a blazing glow of a fire behind them. "Look where that is," he said. The houses looked so familiar, that it took me only a couple of seconds to realize they were on our former street, the one on the left being our adjacent neighbor's. The warehouse behind our old house on O street caught on fire Friday night. It was a massive blaze and they are tearing the thing down, but in the meantime, the houses were evacuated that night and it had taken them 14 hours to calm the fire. I'm sure there must be smoke damage and the back yard to our former house was flooded when we drove by, plus the garage had something big fall on it and will probably be replaced, according to the next door neighbor. Needless to say, my husband and I were very glad we no longer live there! The stentch from the fire was more than just fire and smoke. It was some kind of furnature making warehouse and you could smell that some chemical had been burned. He kept saying, "How would I have gotten you out of there?" As if I were some kind of beached whale. Don't worry, I would have had no problem leaving that sticky, smoky and firy environment. And not too happy about returning. Yet another reason not to buy a property behind a warehouse, eh? And such a blessing from God that we sold when we did. We feel bad for the current residents of that house and the street, but being 9 months pregnant and already having breathing and other issues, would not have been a good time to have that happen. We definitely praise God for the house we have and for keeping us safe.

There must be something else to write about

2005-01-26T15:18:00.000-08:00

Can't seem to think of anything at this time. Blessings of having a wonderful life in between the sickies is all I can think of. The wonderful life is looking forward to the baby and enjoying the husband and family I am blessed with. Gotta go get some more sleep. Trying to collect it all before the baby comes.

one thing after another

2005-01-26T15:12:00.000-08:00

Well, for some reason, this blog has started out being a sick log for me and my husband. I guess that's what we're dealing with. Baby is still moving around like crazy. But the two of us have been quite immobile. After I got better, Hubby took a turn for the worst with his back. Crawling to the bathroom was a horrible experience for me to watch. It's taken about two-three weeks for him to finally be able to walk again normally, thanks to that special chiropractor! Then it was my turn to be bed-ridden again. This time it was pain from the pregnancy and a suspected UTI. I'm feeling better, and looking forward to the BIRTH of our son. His movements are quite fun, but a little more painful than I expected. I guess the 2nd, 3rd and 4th should be a breeze after this. I'm glad I don't have much to complain about though, just to update into my health log. There was one woman in our birthing class who has to have an emergency premature ceasarian, which I thank God we aren't having to deal with.

We were showered with gifts and love at our shower on January 8th. I feel so blessed to have so many who love our child before he's even born!

feeling better

2004-12-20T19:36:00.000-08:00

I'm finally feeling better. This sickness has lingered on for 2 weeks and I wasn't too happy about that yesterday when I didn't make it to church for the 3rd week in a row. In anycase, I'm better today and was able to work again. Now my husband is feeling it. I don't think he got it from me though. Or at least I don't want to think that, so I won't. We're just glad that the baby is ok. He is still moving around in there and seems to be enjoying the room. I hear there won't be much room for him to move in another month, so I hope he enjoys it while it lasts.

coughing up a lung

2004-12-14T10:52:00.000-08:00

I'm new at this and not sure how to start, so I thought I'd tell about what is most current with me. My painful, unmerciful cough and lingering sinus infection. Ok. So I might be exagerating a bit. It could be worse. But being pregnant doesn't help. So each time I cough my lungs feel like they're about to explode to break my ribs and I wonder if my baby isn't just loving the ride. He's been moving around in their like it's a clothes dryer. He's either getting high off the cough syrup, or seriously wanting Mom to keep continue the fun tumbling act. But it's good to know he's ok. Daddy tells him to keep moving around to show me he's ok, so he must be a good listener. He did the same thing when we told him to show us "who" he was for the ultrasound (meaning what sex). He listened so well. We'll see if he's as good of a listener after he's evicted from his nice warm swimming pool of a womb.

Anyway, for my first time blogging, this isn't so bad. The cough has been distracted. Now it only explodes in my lungs and pounds my head every 5 minutes as opposed to 3. It's a sinus infection from hell. I didn't sleep for 2 days, my eyes were all blood shot and I was either coughing or sneezing into a constant stream of kleenex. I collected at least 4 paper grocery bags full of snotted tissues. I guess I was going for the record.

But being this sick has definitely made me appreciate my AMAZING HUSBAND. (being pregnant has done wonders for that as well, but this weekend he really outdid himself) He is so patient and kind and sympathetic. And he empties all my snot tissue bags as he diligently takes out the garbage. He's been to the store 5 or 6 times for me (5 or 6 different stores) in the past 4 days. He's listened to my whine and moan and comforted and prayed for me so well when I thought I was at my wit's end. What would I ever do without him? Roommates would never think to be there like that and my mom told me she doesn't want to be around me in case she gets sick. I guess she's retired from having to take care of sick people. I can't say I blame her, but still. Without a husband like the incredibly fabulous one I have, I would be up a creek without a paddle, still blubbering into my bag of snot tissue. Or worse, it would have taken over the entire house. I guess he's in training for when I go into labor. Who do you feel for the most? I definitely know I can depend on him when I'm at my worst!